Meri dunia me pyar nahi hota…... --1

Majud mujhme ab wo jaha nahi hai

Man karta hai aj jala du sare khwab ko

Kar du fana apne har ek lafzo ko zindgi ki kitab se

Najdikia thi jinse kabhi,unke saye se bhi ab nafrat he

Man mere man ab tujhe kis inteha ki jarurat he

Atoot riste ko aj mene tutte dekha hai,

Apno ko pal me ger bante dekha hai

Faasle badh chuke he,ek duje ko fir bhi dur se taak rahe he

Ijhar hoker bhi chahat ka sapna sakar nhi hota,

akhir koi batyega kyu kyu 

 meri dunia me pyar nahi hota...?

“KaMbHaKhT LeCtUreS !!!”

PAGE 1…

TO meri kahani shuru hoti hai from here ,jab me ek stupid school girl thi,me and my two desk partner’s sonwane and naagar,the most funniest girl I have ever seen in my life! And my seven wonders group..kya din the yaar… Seriously m missing them Lottie…L

BUT m sure jaha bhi honge sab,mujhe jarur miss kar rahe honge..

Bi-GOD ye lectures kitna pakate he yaar..

Mujhe na kisi ka bhi speech se lekar lecture taK,sunne me koi interest -winterest nahi hai ,and honestly speaking mujhe to lectures sunte hi rona aa jata hai …

Jab bhi koi lecture start hota tha, mainly physics ka BI-god mera band-baja baj jata tha,mujhe to lagta tha ki kaash !!!! kaash !!!! aaj teacher meeting ho jaye,ya sir nahi aaye, lecture na lage kese bhi..

Teacher k saamne to acchi khaashi sincere dikhti thi…par mujhe hi malum tha ki actualy me mein kitni sincere hu..?and jese hi kisi ka lecture start hota tha na meri nindo ka silsila bhadta jata tha ,me lecture dene wale ki jheel si eyes me doob jati thi…and then what??????:O

 meri dreamland me acchi khashi entry ho jati thi aur exactly, lecture ke time hi mujhe ya to mujhe kuch likhne k liye acche words milte the, yaa to kuch na kuch planning chalti rehti thi..ki ghumne kaha jana hai vegera -vegera.Kabhi to head down karke so jati thi 

and whenever mam asked with my friends they replied – "mam uski tabiyat theek nahi hai?"
(uff !! kitne papad belti thi is lecture se bachne ko)

 & sometimes,jaane kya soch kar muskura deti thi me

 And guess’s what’s next…..????

Teacher mujhe foran notice karti thi hey…why r u laughing??? sleeping or dreaming????:o

"Oops s!!! Bi –god !!!actually both yaar !!!m sleeping on my dreamland…?"

(not to worry at all be coj ye mene apne aap se kaha ..unse nahi warna wo to din me to stars, moons and etc etc dikha hi deti)

meri friends bhi confused ho jati thi ki akhir mujhe ho kya jata he lecture me?

Mene kayi baar ye try kia ki me apni ye harkat chod du…but no mere ander ka devil mujhse kehta hai –  

“Abey yaar !! ye to tere ander naturally hai…tu kabhi nahi sudher sakti !”

 Meri Kahani..

Kahani  padhna  aur unme kho jana,

Meri adat hai..

Mein har tarah ki kahani padhti hu,

kayi kahani man ko gudgudati hai,

Kayi hasi ki leher chod jati hai,

Kayi dil ko pighalne pe majbur kar deti he,

Kayi kahania kuch baate sochne ko kehti he,

Kahi kahanio ka ant nahi milta,

To kayio ki shurvaat nahi milti,

Kayi kahani adhuri reh jati he..

To kayi puri hone par bhi puri nahi he,

Kayi kahania ek accha pegaam deti he,

Kayi kahania sawalo ke pinjare me ulji si rehti he,

Kayi kahani jeene ki sikh deti he..

to kayi kahaniyo me jeene ki vajha nahi hai

  Me ab bhi ek soch me dubi si hu

   Ki meri kahani kesi hogi??

  In sab se milti julti yaa phir,Thodi alag si..

  yaa in sab se bikul juda hi hogi..

   bada muskil he naa kahani me aage,kya hoga ye jaanna..

  shayad nahi par shaayad haa...

ek ashk he ankho me kuch khawab wo sare,

wo baate dhundhati he ab,

hawa me udate pardo ki tarah nazar aati he
to kabhi chup jati he


na jane kon sa raasta hai.
na jane kon sa mukambal he
jisko chaha uska haath to thama he
phir kis baat ka gam he?


dil ne kaha yaad kar tune kisi ka

dil dhukhaya he
wo muskura raha he kahi tujhe yaad karke
isliye tera dil aaj bhar aaya he


na usko paa saki me ,
na kho hi chuki hu,
ret ki viraaniyo me,

main ek pyaasi leher si hu.

 roj chattano se takraati hu

ajeeb kasham -kas he ,
is dil ke jaha me
ye kesi uljane he,is zindagi ki.........
wo akela hai kahi !!
main tanha hu kahi!!!!

pyaar nahi tha...

ankh khuli to khusi ka

sansaar nahi tha..

ek pal jeena uske beger 

yu to duswar nahi tha...

apne to badle uska gam

kuch kam hi tha..

jispe khud se jada bharosa kiya

wo bhi badal gaya...

itna muskil to raah-e-imitihaan nahi tha

kuchal ke khawab saare ..

jab mene apni dehleezz paar ki...

uske siva aur kisi ka saath nshi tha...

ye dil ki khusnaseebi thi jo seh 

gaya itne dardo gam..

warna saason ka chalna bhi

itna asaan nahi tha...

mujh bekhabar ko kahan.....

malum tha ki tanha tay karna hai

safar zindagi ka....jab usne kaha,

"mujhe tumse pyaar nahi tha"

"  wo ruka bhi to yu ruka meri raaho pe akar,


me phir door nikal gayi thi jab...

apni tanhai ke sath.. "

from  pages of my diary~~ 

VALENTINE DAY..

it was chilly valentine morning,essence of roses makes the atmosphere intoxicated.Quite a long time had passed since the sunset itself in the heart of horizon.The sunlight had come to life & the vehicles passed by an M in pink still sitting in bench in front of lake.while the other peoples were celebrating the day with great enthusiasm.I always enjoy this day with me.

 

m looking continuously at sky,feelings like magical spell and composing a scared verse[poetry].

suddenly the boy looking was came to me &; offered me rose..

 I strangely said, " Sorry ?"

he smiled & replied,"single??"

me-"mind your own business man, don't waste my time !"

  

now i decided to avoiding him," hey listen m tourist, i came here for capturing beauty of this heaven,& m sorry i never meant to hurt you ! but accept this rose on symbol of friendship..

MAIN KOUN SA AAPKO ROZ MILNE WALA HOON ?

(i obeyed his thoughts).." okay ..thanks ..!!! any thing else?"

he, " no..no..okay thanks !! good bye..!!!"(& promptly he ran back)

i take a turn to see him, & what i see?a bus of hospital,& when i came to know about him ..was really very pity.,he's not any tourist but a cancer patient..:-( all hospital members are  with  patients enjoying the tour, on another side i was shocked,happy,feeling sad i really don' t know what's going on here..i went there to met with all of them but i didn't got him..later..my bad luck..!!!!!:-(

"HEY..i remind my late night dream at a time, some one was challenging me i will  make realize you.. what you are:-("

he he he :-D this is called wildest dream..keep dreaming:-D

i was  just speechless ..i happy to be single,& never i feel like but make me to feel like that way..

god that was your agent??convey my message to him "yes..m single but not weak...":-)

really LIFE IS FULL OF SURPRISES..i.e always with me :-(

AHAA...school days...!!!!

memories, 26 January 2002

I am childish and immature at times but then that's
the way I am..I still remember always in school, we were eating during class hours, me  my desk partner's angel &sonu sonwane...too.but i was never pulled up by any teacher ;-)
we were bunking class after lunch &gossiping in commerce section..



"life is full of surprises!!!!!!"
 yeah i do believe...hey  here my happiest & memorable pages from my school diary ..i enjoyed it too but only few questions remaining to know about it..

"  ..a person who always sending letters & greetings to me, i never seen him actually he sending me wishes as my "unknown well wisher",m feeling so shy to told any of my friend but i was so tensed some how,i share it with my close friend angel ..i also saw her all wishes..of him..after reading letters is smiled & say,"koun hai yeh?"she was pulling my leg:-( & politely, replied- " i don't no yaar..i found this... from my bag .. "
incident is invariably till 15 Feb 2005:-( with his lot of well wishes..[for my performance] last "rite now u r thinking that why m sending letter's ? please don't take me any other way m just Ur good friend, deserve this praise ..have a zest for whole life !!"



 still today m in a state of suspense from this incident of my life:-)

1 year to go..

one of my good friend told me," your never tried to understand what you desire? you are totally confused with yourself..that's  your problem?"


till now always m thinking about those words, it seems very simple but a, single question raised in my mind.."how would he know?"

me bhagti rahi hu khud ki parchai se

jese bachna chahti hu khud ki tanhai se..

uska sath hai fir bichandne ka gam hai..

me haarna chati hu khud ki tanhai se..